Obedience in Relationships

Relationship

I believe one of the biggest problems the unchurched have with religion is all of its rules. And let’s face it, if us Christians are being honest with ourselves, we know what they’re talking about. In my morning men’s group a friend of mine said something that really resonated with me. He stated, “Irrational changes only lead to regret”. That is so true. I’ve seen countless people come to Christ, make changes or give things up because someone else is telling them to, and then, because of the pressure to follow the rules, they end up falling away from Christ. Which leads us to this question…

Is it reasonable for God to have expectations?

In every healthy relationship changes are always necessary. These necessary changes are not, “The Rules of Relationship” but rather, the willingness to love the other person in they way they need to be loved. The same goes for our relationship with Christ. But again, is it reasonable for God to have expectations? Yes, because all love relationships do, and if we love him, we will be willing to grow into change with him. Jesus said in John 14:15, “If you love me, keep my commands.” Maybe it’s that we don’t like the word “commands”. Before getting to hung up on the word “commands”, ask yourself these questions; “what are the commands, why are they made, and are they reasonable”? When Jesus was approached by a young lawyer and asked “what is the great commandment?”, Jesus simply replied, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind, and love your neighbor as yourself.” To me, that sounds like something every good parent would require of their children. The reason it’s called a command is that it’s not optional, ever! Some say though that they want nothing to do with God because he’s an irrational tyrant. If we really look at the Bible and the requests God makes in it, his commands and punishments are really not any different than most parents. In all good parenting situations the punishment typically fits the crime. If you were to come home and find that your children had not only neglected their chores and homework, but also had gotten into a huge fight and during the scuffle broke several valuable items around the house, would you be considered an irrational tyrant for being upset and giving your children strong discipline? Of course not! When you’re in a loving relationship there’s not one scenario when love doesn’t have expectations, and when those expectations are not met, adjustments and correction are needed, and in extreme cases, demanded.

How To be a Good Christian

I will admit though, being a good Christian is easier said than done. As odd as this may sound, it’s due to the fact that God doesn’t punish us in the moment for our wrong doings. As it turns out, he typically allows the consequences of our poor choice to deal out their own blows. If we lie and get caught, people no longer trust us. If we get angry and hurt someone, we go to jail. Life punishes us when we misbehave, not God. At some point though, we just decide to stop being selfish, buckle down, and do the right thing, because that’s what the relationship is asking for. There’s an old ancient Chinese proverb that says this, “The journey of a 1,000 miles begins with the first step” and that’s what many of us need to do, just be willing to take that first step towards a healthy relationship with God. Not based off of fear, but love. Jesus said in 1 John 4:18, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”

Letting Go of Fear

The best part of letting go of fear and living in love, is that new ministry always becomes available to the willing and obedient. Not because obedience makes God happy, but rather the desire to be close to him will produce changes in you that will inevitably make you more healthy, and that makes God happy. There are so many people trapped in fear who don’t know how to be set free. God is needing those who understand the freedom of love to help set those captive free. Will you be one of those or will you continue to allow fear to control and dominate your life? “Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8.

Man’s Work VS. God’s Work

Mans Work

The best way to define “mans work” is when he gets it into his heart to set his own course for what he feels is right. He then starts setting up justifications for that course so as not to feel like he’s wrong in his ways. He also will frequently boast, if only to himself, of his Godly exploits, so as to convince himself that God too approves of his labors. He will shirk the responsibilities of true Godly work, as they require consecration, and he doesn’t much care for that notion. Where this becomes most treacherous though, is that he is thoroughly convinced he is completely in the will of God. So much so that he will even become disagreeable and angry with anyone who points out the flaws in his charter. For this man, his journey will be wrought with pain, and at times, even torment, because in the deepest parts of this man lies rebellion, and rebellion stands exactly opposite of the nature of God.

Gods Work

Godly work however is often path of loneliness. Most times, friends are scarcely found when this work is being done. Many a man wants little to do with the fires of that forge because the heat alone reminds them of there own need of a savior. This is where the justifications of, “needing to be like the world to win the world” is shed and the need to be made whole in the ways of Godliness enter him. The fear that’s brought on by the rejection of peers melts away as this man begins to care more for what God measures him by than what popular opinion would. The justifying phrase, “I’m not perfect and it’s ridiculous to ever think that I could be” is no longer used, because the meaning of true perfection is understood. Perfection being that which is made whole in God’s love, and then shared with compassion and mercy to all who God would bring you in contact with. This work is not for the faint of heart, but rather for the heart that has been made strong by deep desire. Desire to please God, to be close to him no matter the cost, and to be obedient in all things.

This mans path will also be difficult, but not for the same reason as the man who does his own work. The Godly man, like a trained soldier, will endure the hardships of trails arranged by God. Tests of patience, courage, and peace will lay in wait around many bends in his road. Not to punish or to beat him into submission as many men say of God, but rather to teach him the ways of humanity, and to shape his heart into that of love. This work can only be claimed by the man himself. No other man, nor even God himself, can set him on this path. It must be chosen freely, and the cost counted and willing to be paid in full. This path, the path of Godly work, it is the only path that will ever lead to peace.

The Fallen Soldier

God, in hopes to win back the heart of his fallen servant, will always send a faithful servant to give a warning and a promise. Many of those who have become slothful in heart have also become unwilling to take the message of repentance serious, thereby revealing a lack of their good character. In their hearts they have decided that the temporal things are more important than the blessings that God has in store for them. This is easy for many to do, as the unseen requires faith to obtain while the seen gives us instant gratification with little to no work. This is where Godly character is on trial because the slothful man is deciding between continuing on with man’s work, or picking up the responsibility of Gods work.

The Warning

If a man continues to ignore Gods offers, eventually, God will withdraw the offer and present it at a later time. But only after the man has been set on a path of hardships, teaching his character to be more God conscious. This path is full of thorns, thistles, and ditches. Many blessings that were received when he lived a Godly life will be robbed and stripped from him. Not because God is angry and no longer protects him, but because the end of, “that which seems right to a man” is always death.

“There is a way that seems right to a man,
But its end is the way of death.” Proverbs 14:12

“Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith, without doubting, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. He is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.” James 1:5-8

Will God Really Use Me?

As you may already know, Ephesians 3:20 tells us, God “is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think”, yet many of us still struggle with the question, “but will He use me?”. I think I the answer is found in the last part of that same verse; “according to the power at work within us.” The second part is telling us that God is accomplishing more than we could ask or think when His power is at work within us, and not just somewhere out in the universe. So the real question becomes, what limits God’s work within me? Here’s a few big ones that are at the top of the list. Our beliefs and actions often determines His ability to use us. If I believe that He can, then I’ll live like He will, while if I believe that He can’t, then I’ll live like He won’t. And equally as important is to no longer live in the justification of sin, because this lifestyle always stands contrary to the will of God, and inevitably limits our ability to properly hear His voice.

All Who Are Weary

Have you ever wondered if those who are born into painful situations, or are currently in one, are more susceptible to God’s blessings?

There’s an interesting little prayer that’s tucked away in the opening chapters of 1 Chronicles that just may answer our question. This simple prayer was prayed by a man whose very name means “sorrow”. His name is, Jabez. Other than his name meaning sorrow, and that he was honorable, we really don’t know much about him. However, I want to share some of the little we do know because I believe the implications are profound.

“Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying: “I gave birth to him in pain.” Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, saying: “Oh that You would bless me indeed and enlarge my territory! Let Your hand be with me, and keep me from the evil one.” And God granted his request.” 1 Chronicles 4:9-10

It’s interesting that there are only three facts given to us about Jabez. He was honorable, he was born into pain, and he prayed a simple prayer. Yet here we are, reading how the Lord granted his request. It doesn’t tell us what Jabez did that caused him to be found “honorable”, we only know that he was in pain, he cried out for God to bless him, and God granted his request. Amazing!

There’s a beautiful scripture in the book of Matthew that comes straight from the mouth of Jesus that sums up so well the story of Jabez;  

“Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” Matthew‬ ‭11‬:‭28‬-‭30‬ ‭NLT‬‬

What makes Jesus so willing to help the hurting with little to no effort on their part? And, are there any other examples of this behavior that we can find in the Bible? There was the woman with the issue of blood, she didn’t have to ask to be healed, she just touched the edge of his clothes and was instantly granted her healing.
Zacchaeus had inner turmoil, and without saying a word, was given the rare opportunity to have Jesus come to his house for dinner. After Zacchaeus promised to right his wrongs, Jesus calls him, “a true son of Abraham”.
The woman caught in adultery never asked Jesus for forgiveness, yet it was granted to her. The list goes on, and it makes sense that it does, because…

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalms 34:18

Is this you? Are you hurting? Do you feel forgotten? Does your spirit feel crushed within you? You are not alone, and you are definitely not forgotten. Jesus is as close as to you as just mentioning His name. Try it, say his name and call to him. Your healing may not be instant, but He will come just as soon as you ask, and He will start to heal your broken heart just as soon as you allow Him to. I promise you! Better yet, His Word promises you.

Ministry Or Pastime

It’s unfortunate, but far too many of us Christians have lost sight of what ministry is supposed to look like. We’re like an abandoned lighthouse that once guided ships through the darkness and fog, but now, are nothing more than a hollow shell of a Christian that only serves as a reminder of what once was. We obtained approval, was appointed to the ministry we always wanted, but somewhere along the way, completely lost sight of what ministry is all about. Ministry isn’t a title or a position. It’s not about the size of the crowd involved in our work, nor is it about the approval of our peers. It’s about a calling, a desire, and a passion to share the love of Jesus in all that we do. Paul, in Romans 15:1-2, reminds us of what this is supposed to look like. “Those of us who are strong and able in the faith need to step in and lend a hand to those who falter, and not just do what is most convenient for us. Strength is for service, not status. Each one of us needs to look after the good of the people around us, asking ourselves, “How can I help?”

Called and Chosen

At some point in our lives, knowing that we are called is a struggle that all of us will face. We ask ourselves questions like, “Is God really on my side?” And, “God sees how much I fail, so how will my life ever amount to anything more than what it already is?” Matthew 22:14 tells us, “For many are called, but few are chosen.” This is the place where most of us hang our heads in defeat and say, “yeah, I’m definitely not part of those chosen few”, but that’s where you’re wrong. It’s not God deciding that you’re not good enough, it’s you speaking that over yourselve. God says “you are more than a conqueror” but instead, we believe a lie and say, “I’m not worthy, so I could never be chosen”. If we’re ever going to be “more than a conqueror”, we have to pick ourselves up, run to God, and allow Him to remind us of His unfailing love. Don’t allow Satan to steal the promises God has made to you. You ARE called! Remember, it’s by your faith in God’s goodness and love, and by your willingness to be obedient, that you will make yourself chosen. All of us here are called, so let’s make ourselves chosen, because someone out there needs what we have to offer.

Wisdom vs. Conviction

Two people who are on my mind this morning is king David and his son Solomon. No two people in the Bible had more to say about wisdom than these guys. Funny thing is, king David made two extremely unwise decisions (Bathsheba and counting the people) and he paid dearly for them. Solomon made so many unwise decisions that they can’t even be counted or listed here. And as ironic as it is, Solomon is the one who was granted wisdom, above any other living person, from God himself.

What am I trying to say?

Wisdom alone will not carry us through, we also need Godly conviction. In fact, sometimes wisdom will plot and scheme to get its own selfish way, like we see with Solomon. I would say that the example of Solomon teaches us that it’s far better to have conviction than wisdom, but I would also say that conviction will always lead us to Godly wisdom.

The Subtle Long Game

Satan’s Long Game

I think we all know first hand how subtle Satan can be. From Adam and Eve all the way to you and I, being subtle is how he’s operated all along. I think though, he’s mainly taken his tactics from God’s playbook.

God’s Subtle Playbook

God also typically works in subtle ways. A little seed planed, a little water sprinkled on, and then a little sunlight to give that seed warmth. And before you know it, life! Salvation is discovered. A new calling is stepped into, or ministry began. A broken relationship is mended and a grudge is forgiven. It may take a million steps, many in the wrong direction, but most in the right, to get us to that destination, but in the end, God is the true master of the long game. Satan happens to realize its effectiveness, that’s why he mimics it. But make no mistake, we are all on one of two paths in a long game, that’s why it’s important to always know who our true master is. This path is chosen by our secret choices, and by our fruit. Remember, we can’t have two masters. The moment we believe this lie is the moment we fully embrace Satan’s path.

The Church in the Long Game

I believe it’s not too difficult to see that both God and Satan have a long game that’s constantly being played out in this world, and it’s the choices of the church that ultimately decides who’s in the lead. This is why the church needs to be awake and take seriously our actions.

Why Death?

It was decided at the very beginning of humanity, that if sin were committed, death would have to take place as a result. Man didn’t decide this, God did. God killed that animal and covered the shame of Adam and Eve. Next, when addressing the serpent, God prophesied of His own death for a humanity that would become lost in their guilt and shame.

God Could’ve Made it Easier on Himself

God could’ve made it so much easier on Himself by choosing not to tie death to sin, but He did it anyway. It’s all because of another law that He set in motion. This law states that our lives are the most precious gift we’ve been given. So it makes sense that He would tie forgiveness and salvation (gifts only He can give) to our life, and then make the cost of death to be set accordingly. What’s truly amazing about all of this, is that all of these gifts come from Him. The only gift we can bring to this equation, is willingness. That’s all we have to offer, and that’s all He wants from us.

The Battle

This battle of choosing between “hunger for worldly things” vs “things of the Spirt” is constantly at work. It never really stops. No matter how well I’m doing in my relationship with God, lust always lurks just under the surface. Pride is always right there trying to tell me that I’ve earned what I have, and that I deserve more. Fear tells me that God doesn’t really love me, and in fact, there is no God. Over the years I’ve asked God to remove these things from me, but He doesn’t. He has definitely helped me to better understand where they come from, but they never really leave. Eventually, I’ve come to understand that growth is an on going process that requires endurance.

“But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.” Matthew 24:13

The Birthplace of Excuses

Want to know a little secret that I’m not too happy to admit, pride often gets the best of me. At this point in the admitting process though, I’d like to sort of brush it off and say, “but that’s everyone”. All of us here are smart enough to know that when we make the, “everyone else is doing it too” excuse, what we’re actually saying is that we’re just not really interested in change. If I can justify my poor behavior by everyone else’s, I’m good, no need to work on anything. So if all my coworkers are telling dirty jokes or gossiping, and I decide to jump in too, I’m guilty. If my church friends talk negatively about about their spouse and I take the opportunity to throw mine under that same bus, I’m guilty too. If nobody else in the restaurant appears to be a Christian and I choose not to openly give thanks to God for all He has provided, you already guessed it, I’m guilty too.

Here’s the Key Factor

Making the choice to be humble doesn’t just mean being willing to say I’m sorry AFTER we do something dumb, it’s also being willing NOT to give ourselves the permission to do it in the first place. We all know about the “Pride of Life” that lead Adam and Eve down the apple eating path, and ultimately, got them removed from the garden. Is that what I’m interested in, separation from God? Of course not! Why then do I so quickly offer my excuse rather than my apology? Because pride lead me to the poor decision in the first place.

The God of Deliverance

The God of Deliverance

How many of you love the story of King David? I do! He’s my favorite Bible character. One of the reasons we love him so much is because of all the obstacles he overcame before becoming king. At a young age he conquered a lion and a bear, then went on to conquer an almost 10 foot giant with only a sling. After this, he moved into the palace where he had to overcome a jealous king who wanted him dead. It wasn’t until his own trusted men wanted to kill him for not protecting their wives and children that he himself could finally become king. Nearly all of David’s formative years were extremely difficult, yet in Psalm 68 he writes this; “God is to us a God of deliverances; And to God the Lord belong escapes from death.” Psalm 68:2. David knew what he was talking about when he called God, “The God of Deliverance”. If anybody could start claiming negative over their situations, it was David! Yet David calls God, “ The God of deliverance”. This is actually one of the names of God, and is translated “El Lemosha”. David gave us this name of God only after he had faced all of his adversities and placed his trust in the God of Deliverance rather than in the pain of the situation.

My Problems

Often times, when our lives get difficult and uncomfortable, we find ourselves claiming ownership of the negative circumstances rather than the deliverance God promises us. Our faith starts to wane, which leads to feeling frustrated and overwhelmed, and soon, we start saying things such as “my crazy life, my allergies, my terrible job, my out of control spending” and so on. You may think, “what’s the problem with that, lots of good Christians talk like this!” The problem is, when it comes time to let go and get deliverance, it will be so much more difficult. Why? Because we’ve been claiming ownership of the negative rather than the deliverance. When one tough situation after another has bombarded you, and stress has begun to mount up, how long does it take until you find yourself telling others “MY anxiety has been through the roof lately! There is just too much on MY plate”. As Christians, we know that it’s by our words and actions that we display faith. So why do we claim ownership of the negative in our lives, and thereby display faith in the difficult situation rather than God? Don’t you think God would rather us claim ownership of his promises than of the negative of life?

The question we need to ask ourselves is this, is God the God of my deliverance, or am I claiming the negative situation to be God of my life? Let go of the pain, and like David, allow God to be your El Lemosha, “The God of Deliverance”.